Lately for a snack, I've been having these bitty squares of Laughing
Cow cheese. I love cheese, and have been known to eat an entire block
in one sitting, so I try to eat one of these little suckers instead whenever I have a cheese craving.
Anyway, each tiny square comes wrapped in this little piece of foil
with random factoids on the inside. Actually, I've noticed that a lot
of individually wrapped food comes with little sayings or facts on the
wrappers - I kind of wonder what the point is, since I imagine it would
be cheaper to put nothing on the insides of the wrappers.I guess it's
marketing, but I gotta say, I'm not likely to pick one product over the
other because of all the awesome information or inspirational sayings
I'm going to get from the packaging. Interestingly enough, my favorite beer also
comes with little sayings under the bottle cap, though they're neither
inspirational nor educational. Mostly, they're just a little odd.
So, here are twelve things I've learned from cheese. And one thing I've learned from beer.
1. Vatican employees pay no income tax. This seems perfectly fair to me. I mean, who would they pay it to? The Pope? God?
2. In 1896 tickets from an Olympic competition cost about 16 cents. Incidentally, the 1896 Olympics were the first modern Olympics and were held in Athens, Greece from April 5 to April 16.
3. If the earth could be scaled down, it would be smoother than a billiard ball. I have no idea what that even means, but it sounds good to me.
4. The official bird of New Mexico is the roadrunner. And in
case you're interested, the official flower is the Yucca flower. The
state animal is the black bear, the state fish is the cutthroat trout
and the state insect tarantula hawk wasp. Which sounds simultaneously
very cool, and really scary. The state motto is Crescit Eundo, which
means "It grows as it goes."I have no idea what that means, either.
5. Roman statues were created with detachable heads so that one head could be replaced by another. Those crazy Romans... always thinkin'. If only we could do that with people.
6. Beer making requires a tenth of the 7 million tons of rice grown in the U.S. each year.
I think it's interesting that my cheese has beer facts, but my beer
doesn't have any cheese facts. Maybe I should suggest it to them.
7. In 1917 the first Girl Scout cookies were sold for less than 25 cents a box.
In 1917, though, 25 cents was the same as approximately $3.50 today. So
the price hasn't really increased all that much. The first cookies were
baked and sold by a troop in Muskogee, OK in their high school
cafeteria.
8. The world's number one food crop is wine grapes. Um, duh.
9. Americans spent more than $110 billion on fast food in 2001. And in 2002, they spent double that on angioplasty, heart transplants and joint replacements.
10. Every second 3,300 cups of coffee are consumed worldwide. Many of them in my office.
11. 18 doctors in the U.S. share the name Dr. Doctor and one is named Dr. Surgeon.
Frankly, I don't think I'd go to a doctor named Dr. Doctor. It shows an
appalling lack of creativity. "So, what do you want to be when you grow
up?" "I dunno... my name is doctor. I guess I'll be that." I'd be way
more impressed with a Dr. Nurse or a Dr.Plumber. Or Dr. Middle-level Manager
12. Only one of the Seven Wonders of the Ancient World still survives. It's the Great Pyramid at Giza. Four were destroyed by earthquake, one by fire and one by arson followed by plundering.
And finally, from my beer bottle cap:
13. Time is slow when your [sic] six feet below. Not only is
that the most depressing thing I've ever read while drinking a beer,
but it's also grammatically incorrect. I guess whoever is in charge of
the pithy bottle cap sayings has been sampling the product during work
hours.
Plus a Stinky Diapers from yesterday.